● @ Thursday, August 17, 2006 ●
i slept really early yesterday.. :( was ok. just that i got tired and i somehow rather jumped onto the bed and fell asleep. i can't seem to remember anything..
yesterday afternoon was a slightly busy day for myself.. i had to rush to meet mrs lee after sch and mrs j changed teh bio focus time to straight after school instead of having it after physics focus. i was dismayed initially but later realised that it's to my benefit instead. i'm ok with anything la. anyway i dont think i will have to meet mrs lee on a weekly basis le. perhaps just once every fortnight or a mth since she said that it's necessary for her to catch up with me once in a while like what she does for kelly tan. shan't talk too much about her since it's not very nice for her.. ya.. so i just feel that i dont have to be counselled as i'm fine le.
i'm facing some new problems recently though. but they are manageable.. that's why i see no necessity in me meeting up with mrs lee le. :) anyway mrs jacon asked me yesterday when she was telling me abt bio focus.. lol.. mrs jacon. nvm.. hha.. she asked me why i was wearing such big ear rings twice as i ignored her qs the first time. but i ignored it again when she repeated her qs. haha.... she doesn't sound angry la.. she just sounded surprised and curious lor... and my response was to just stareeeeeee at her equally large ear rings. =P
mrs jane chng is still siao. a few days back, she just asked "how's Kelly chua?" out a sudden during lesson making me stunned. i went diao manz. and well... i really dun think she knows abt my case. cus i have trust in mrs j and mrs koh tt she wont tell mrs chng. hmm.. and neither did i try to (shit whats that word.. argh. i duno.. ) be baised towards her or what soeevr lor.. siao.. and she told nigel who was sitting next to me, that "kelly's a nice girl. you should try to know her.." something like that. but she said nice girl but i was distracted with that comment for i was eyeing around at the class suspiciously to see if anyone will make any scpetical comments or disagreements. and sure enough, i heard a very disgruntled and sarcastic hai yu exclaiming "ya". haha.. its ok with me though. cus its nth new. haha..
and anyway, that mrs jacob is starting to stress our class which is so wa liaow lor. hai.. and what i dislike most or rather should i say detest most is what the principal said the otehr day. she was saying that teh sec 4s are too late to be helped by the teachers, etc, for its very near to the Os and nothing can be done for us. wa liaow lor.. can she be a smarter and brighter person? if you know that teh time's almost going to be up for us, why the hell do you have to tell us that and try to demoralise us? teh word 'demoralise' needs to be highlighted.
she's brainless la. there's no use telling us that its too late and we plus teh teachers cant do anything to change our academic performance. its no use lor. if you know that the time's up, at least try beingmore productive by encouraging/ motivating us to study right? at least that helps something lorz. i just find her dumb lor.. keep demoralising us.. what purpose does it serve man..
so.. teachers are trying to stress us left right centre recently.. but.. i'm used to it liao la. hai.. i am still unsatisfied with myself. but i'm just glad that i have moved on with life now, away from teh unhappy, saddening and meaningless lie that i once had. fatigue is now my greatest enemy. and so is my lack of discipline. i see no reason why i can't sleep at my desired time. i'm not being ridiculous ei8ther. i'm not asking myself to sleep at 2am or what. thus i can't see why i can't. damn it. hai..
time is running out.. sigh.. and i felt disturbed when i read hui2 blog recently. she mentioned about herself feeling disappointed with herself over her tests results. i refelcted and i felt disturbed. its normal for one to feel disturbed over their own poor performance or a performance thats under expectations. but why aren't i feeling tis way recently? i realise that this is the consequence that i'm suffering after my one mth depression. sigh.. i just dont feel anything lei.. if i do badly or what.. unless i fail la. that my eyes will widen. but i feel dead recently. sigh.. i've really got to wake up.. hai..
i wana go le. cya..
anyway dont waste ur time guessing who's teh guy la.. not saying anyone la. just that it's a waste of time since we're no longer together. anyway, i had no ulterior motive of being with him; so no worries galz.
take care!
cya.
hai..
!! Disicpline & Determination!! i'm back. =D
Savour Every Moment
